Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
