I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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