Your face is a jimmy john
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
