at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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