Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize