I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Randomize
