I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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