There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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