Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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