D3 body, D1 cock
It's Friday. Sex?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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