What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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