I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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