I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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