somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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