There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
one two three fourrrrnication!
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
