I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
