in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
