I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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