fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
