..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize