i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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