Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
