I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
