I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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