If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize