Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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