Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
