Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You made out with two different species that night
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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