Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize