You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
