we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
