Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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