I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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