A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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