she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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