She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize