Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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