we have officially lost it.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup