Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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