you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
