I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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