How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
