He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize