Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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