Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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