So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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