No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
