it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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