its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you mean i was at the winter classic?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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