i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
