Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
